Lilo's First Job
by The Crazy Chemist
Summary: Lilo is all grown up! Just a funny short one-shot dabbling of Lilo at a first day of work. Read to find out what happens. I don't own Disney's magnificent Lilo and Stitch and thus Lilo, Stitch, Angel, Jumba, and Pleakley.


"Do you have any questions about operating the cash register?"

"Nope, just press the item the customer ordered to tally up prices, take the customers' method of payment with an aloha smile, give back the correct amount of change, and send off the order to the chefs, right?" Lilo repeated to make sure her boss knew she was paying attention. It was her first day on the job at Island Taco and she wasn't going to blow it. She felt proud and confident in her new work uniform: orange polo shirt, brown pants, and a matching orange hat.

"Exactly, Lilo! You're catching on fast!" the boss said with a smile. "Now let me show you how to operate the drive up window," they both turned around. "Here you monitor the screen and watch to see when a customer pulls up. When they do, you greet them in this microphone by saying 'Aloha! Welcome to Island Taco: the home of the Maui taco. May I take your order?'"

"Aloha! Welcome to Island Taco: the home of the Maui taco. May I take your order?" Lilo repeated with as much enthusiasm as she could muster.

"Good! Then you just let the customer order what they want. Remember, the customer is always right. Also, always ask questions to clarify, like 'Do you want lettuce and tomato on the side?' and 'Do you want our famous hot sauce on your taco?' Oh look, here comes a customer! I'll help you through the first one," the boss pointed to the screen putting the microphone around Lilo's head.

Lilo's mouth dropped: it was Jumba, Pleakley, Stitch, and Angel. She could tell on the screen that Pleakley was instructing Jumba - the driver of the dune buggy - on how to pull up into the drive thru properly without knocking down the order sign. As a result, they were going like a half a mile an hour with some sudden lurches forward.

That gave Lilo some time to take some needed deep breaths and wipe the sweat from her brow. Unfortunately, she remembered the time when Nani was trying to find a job so Cobra wouldn't force the split of their family of two. Every time, Stitch wrecked Nani's job chances. In retrospect, possibly some of it was her fault. Why had she made Stitch dress in a Hawaiian shirt and kiss an old lady? Why had she dressed Stitch in an Elvis costume so he could play Devil in Disguise at the beach? Wait – that was actually pretty cool! She could only hope Jumba and Pleakley wouldn't be much like –

"Aren't you going to greet the customer?" the boss reminded.

"Oh yes… Aloha! Welcome to Island Taco…" the boss pressed the button on her microphone as Lilo looked at the screen getting suddenly nervous. She could see Pleakley flailing his arms – probably in fascination by the menu selections.

Second try, deep breath.

"Aloha. Welcome to Island Taco: the home of the Maui taco. May I take your order?"

"Not-so-little-girl! Is that being you?" Jumba answered in surprise.

"Yes…" Lilo grunted. Her boss gave her a bad look. "May I take your order?"

On the screen, Lilo could see Stitch scurry on top of Jumba's lap. "Stitch… wants…" scratchy voice trying to decide, "…taco…"

"What kind of taco?" Lilo questioned as her boss gave her a pat on the back.

Stitch thought for a long time, like he was trying to work through a quantum mechanics problem. "Pollo… loco… yeah…"

"Are you sure, it's spicy? You know that doesn't agree with your sensitive digestive system."

"Lilo! Don't deny the customer!"

Lilo huffed. Boy was she going to have it tonight. "Do you want tomato and lettuce on your pollo loco taco?"

"Ih! Naga!"

"Okay, sounds good. Want some-"

"Lilo you should clarify what the customer just said."

Lilo huffed again. She could read a whole novel in Tantalog within an hours' time. "Do you want tomato on your taco?"

"Ih!"

"And what does that mean? My _boss_ can't understand you," Lilo sighed. Maybe she should go find another job - one in outer space where everyone spoke Tantalog and zombies ruled the universe with their ancient voodoo.

"Yes…" Stitch spoke as Pleakley got out of the car.

"Okay. Do you want lettuce on your taco?"

"Naga… Stitch mean… no!"

"Okay," pressing the cash register keypad. "What else may I get you?"

"Huzziuh!" Angel replied.

"You mean you want the same?" Lilo asked. She hoped Jumba and Pleakley wouldn't speak in some alien language as well.

"Ih yes!" Angel purred joining Stitch in the back of the dune buggy.

Boy, was she _really_ going to have it tonight - maybe she would sleep in the living room to be safe. But that room was close to the bathroom. Maybe outside? Outside is good.

"Okay, right now I have you down for two pollo loco tacos. Is that all?"

"No!" Jumba answered looking at Pleakley quizzically.

"You go ahead, Jumba. I'm still deciding what I'm going to order," Pleakley chimed lacing his hands around the ordering sign and admiring its craftsmanship.

"Okay? Jumba'll have the best fish taco."

"Sounds good. Do you-"

"Why is it being considered best fish taco?" Jumba questioned.

Lilo was stunned by his question. "Um well, you order that all the time. You should know."

"Lilo, stop being rude to the customer!"

Lilo huffed. "Sorry for my rudeness… It is the best fish taco because it is made with the best captured tuna and pollock, cooked on a premier stove, and seasoned with our homemade seasoning." She felt like she was making a commercial for TV. Glimpsing at the screen, she could see Jumba taking notes and a line of cars almost stretching to the restaurant entrance.

"And what is being homemade seasoning?"

"It's a secret recipe, Uncle Jumba."

"But Jumba has allergies to specific foods."

"Quit it Jumba! You just want the recipe so you can feed it to your new evil monstrosities!" Pleakley scolded.

"Do not!"

"Do too!"

"Do not!"

"Do too!"

"Not!"

"Too!"

"Okay! Let's all just calm down!" Lilo screamed into the microphone. "I have you down for two pollo loco tacos and a best fish taco. May I get you anything else?"

"I'll have a best fish taco too! You advertised it very well prized _Island Taco employee_!" Pleakley cheered getting into the buggy. "And by the way, I noticed in fine print at the bottom of your sign – which has a dent on the back if you may ask – that customers with birthdays get a special, free, Island Taco sombrero!"

"Who's birthday is it?" Lilo scowled at the screen. Her boss behind her was getting extra excited.

"It's Jumba's!" Pleakley giggled.

"No it isn't!" Jumba protested nudging Pleakley.

"Yes it is!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"Any drinks?!" Lilo screamed over the commotion.

"No!"

"Okay! So I have two pollo loco tacos and two best fish tacos. Does this all sound correct?"

"Don't forget the sombrero!" Pleakley pointed to the screen accusingly.

"Okay, meet me up at the window. That will be $20.52."

On the screen, Lilo could see Pleakley instructing Jumba on how to drive through the narrow drive thru without hitting the curb. No luck - he hit it at least three times. At least he didn't hit the building – she didn't want to work overtime for the rest of her life.

"Lilo, since it's the customer's birthday, you need to sing them the happy birthday song." Her boss handed her a colorful, large sombrero.

"What?" Lilo scowled. What was she making – 7 bucks an hour?

"It goes like this: happy happy taco birthday to you – TO YOU! Not nacho birthday taco birthday to you – TO YOU! We at Island Taco wish you a haaaappy haaaapy biiiirthdaaaaay! We hope all your taco dreams come true!"

Lilo gave her boss, who was in a funny pose, a blank stare. This was interrupted by Jumba knocking on the drive thru window. Maybe her ohana was finally starting to get hungry and wanted to hurry up the process.

"Aloha, $20.52," Lilo smiled taking a credit card from Jumba. "Thank you." Lilo swiped the credit card, but it failed to make payment. "Do you have any other method of payment? Your credit card isn't working."

"No problemo! I've got 28 of those babies!" Pleakley smiled handing a credit card to Jumba to hand to Lilo.

Lilo tried nearly 17 of her aunt's credit cards and she was relieved when one finally worked. "Okay, here is your credit card and receipt," Lilo smiled leaning out of the window. Jumba handed them to Pleakley. "And here is your food. Have a-"

Her boss nudged her.

With a sigh and in unison, "Happy happy taco birthday to you – TO YOU! Not nacho birthday taco birthday to you – TO YOU! We at Island Taco wish you a haaaappy haaaapy biiiirthdaaaaay! We hope all your taco dreams come true!"

Lilo put the sombrero on top of Jumba's head – he looked angry and astonished. "Have a good day! Come back soon!"

"Taka!" Stitch smiled digging inside the bag and laughing at how moronic Jumba looked.

Her family drove away – finally. The rest of her day ran rather smoothly. No Tantalog and no birthdays - until Pleakley took the 'come back soon' too seriously and forced Jumba to get back in line.


End file.
